12.20.17 - 12/20/2017


It is that time. Resolutions for the new year need to be made. My big and all encompassing resolution for 2018 is to accomplish the goals I made for myself in 2017, which are things I should have done in 2016, because I promised myself Iíd get them done in 2015 as a result of coming up short in 2014 after not changing my life for the better in 2013. In any event, here are my 2018 resolutions: I resolve to work on my low self esteem, although I don't think I can do it. I just donít think I have what it takes. Iím not a strong person. I resolve to stop being a procrastinator. I have developed a plan to help me achieve this goal, a plan I will put into action before February. Maybe March is a better month, now that I think about it. In any event, Iíll certainly activate my anti-procrastination plan by spring. I resolve to stop yelling at the television set during New York Yankee games. Yelling hasnít accomplished a thing. Itís almost like they canít hear me. I resolve to spend less time working, so I hope people around me resolve to work more because stuff needs to get done. I resolve to drink more water. Everybody tells me to drink more water, including the doctor who once removed the ďbiggest Iíve ever seenĒ kidney stone from me. Since I never want to see this man again, I will drink more water. I think the key is to mix the water with something that tastes good. I have a couple of ideas. I resolve to stop being critical of stupid people who really are stupid. If, however, I see someone screw up the use of ďitsĒ and ďitísĒ Iím going to speak up. Iíd call it a pet peeve of mine except that I resolved years ago to get rid of all my pet peeves and be more tolerant. I resolve to not get a tattoo. I love this resolution because it is so easy to keep. I resolve not to smoke cigarettes. Considering I havenít had a cigarette since 1981, this probably doesnít sound like much of a resolution. I keep resolving it, though, because Iíve seen too many people pick up the habit again after many years. Iíve also seen too many people with lung cancer. Besides, every once in a blue moon I get the urge for a cigarette, so I need to keep my guard up. I resolve to use the money I save from not buying cigarettes to buying more Lottery tickets. Iím tired of working, which is why I resolved to work less this year. Winning the Lottery could be my way out. We will see how 2018 goes. I have high expectations, but I resolve not to get discouraged if my resolutions for 2019 are much the same as what you have just read.